Musings From A Musical Mind

"Anticipation" by American illustrat...

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I have not been able to shake a feeling the last couple of days.  And feelings being what they are – “feelings” – I have tried to push it down and ignore it.

Last night it had an ever-growing intensity – I was not feeling well either so that might have contributed to this – uh – feeling – but I’m not sure.  My stomach was jumpy and I could actually feel anticipation.

There have only been a couple of times that I have felt like this.  It’s the feeling that I get when somebody is about to jump out at me – saying “BOO” – or when I am looking at some daunting task before me – and need to “jump in” or “jump off” as it were.   The same feeling in my stomach – in preparation for it to lurch and dance around.

But since I have no reason to feel this way – and certainly not last night – it’s been a little unnerving.  Life is pretty calm here these days.  Oh like everyone else – I have some unresolved issues with a friend and have not been able to put that to right – as of yet – and there are some other issues – but nothing that has not been there before.  It is nothing new in my world.  Things are calm – if not totally resolved or finished.  And yet...I feel it.  Ever building.  Ever present.  Anticipation.

In my spirit I can feel something – I’m just not sure what it is.  But there is a whisper of hope – a whisper of anticipation with that hope.  And although it is scary – the dark unknown – it makes me smile.

Do you suppose that things are about to change – for the better in issues that I have had no control over?  Things that I was sure were hopeless and unresolvable?  Or are “feelings” just feelings.  Does God whisper to you in your spirit – something you just can’t shake?

When was the last time you had a “feeling” you couldn’t shake?  A feeling of anticipation?  Did you ever find out the reason for it, later?

One of my favorite Carly Simon songs is called “Anticipation” – here it is for you to listen to – Enjoy and God Bless!

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Comments on: "A Feeling Of Anticipation" (12)

  1. I love how you put your feelings in text. Beautiful. I believe that feelings are there for a reason. With that said, we can allow ourselves to be governed by our feelings. Listen to “yourself” but always make a right choice within the Spirit’s leading.

    • Thanks Moe – that’s so sweet of you! Yes – you’re right – feelings can sometimes just be “feelings” and we need to not rely on them but make spirit guided decisions :)

  2. I don’t think I’ve been feeling anticipation lately. It’s more like frustration – what to do, what direction to go, etc. I feel more like…I don’t know how to describe it. I’d say “overwhelmed”, but the only thing I feel overwhelmed about is so much uncertainty and lack or direction or something in my life.

  3. Cindy,

    I already told you. My book doesn’t come out until January. You’re gonna have to throttle back the excitement.

    Seriously though, I think it’s because you’ve been spending too much time with dogs. They make you crazy. But I do anticipate things getting better for you and Greg. You’re due.

    • That’s it Ray – It’s all about YOUR BOOK! How silly of me to have forgotten ;) Macy is a sweet dog – I’m sure it’s not her. We’re thinking of adopting a little furry friend for me to be with when Greg works nights – we’ll see….Thanks Ray – I’m sure you’re right about things being better :)

  4. I feel that right now. I’ve been jumpy about certain things going on in my life on and off for years. Particular issue arose in the last week or so and tomorrow is a very big day for decisions. I’m having a very hard time concentrating on my work and I feel like I’m about to jump out of my skin. I have a seminar tomorrow morning and an article due on Friday. Can’t wrap my head around them to finish. I’m just about done, but I just can’t focus. Been listening to my new favorite Christian song for days- over and over, but I don’t yet feel a peace.

  5. Love Carly Simon and this song in particular! I often have that feeling, like something’s coming just around the corner and I can’t quite reach out and touch it. Sometimes it resolves; sometimes it doesn’t. Yes, I think it does harbinger change, but how much, what or when we have no way of knowing until it gets here. It can be unnerving, but I think it can also serve to put us on our guard, as it were, for whatever is turning that corner. Better prepared and nothing happens than to not be prepared and get bulldozed later. That’s how I feel, at any rate.

  6. Wonder if the anticipation has something to do with us dog-sitting Macey…you never know when she will do something unexpected; she’s a Beagle – ha!

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