Musings From A Musical Mind

I’m still chuckling about yesterday’s post – Men Are simple – Come on – it was funny.  But I realized I wasn’t being totally fair to the great Men out there – and in my life.  But I was reminded of a past “Cosby” show, where Alvin (future son-in-law to Heathcliff) says, “Why can’t we all just have simple bodies – like Dad!  And Sandra (his lovely fiancee’) shoots back, “There’s nothing complicated about your body”.   I thought I would die laughing – not just because of how it was said – but because of the look on Bill Cosby’s face – Priceless.

Simple Bodies.  Wow.  Well no woman could EVER be accused of having one of those – that’s for sure.  Case and point.  A guy walks into a clothing store to buy a pair of jeans.  He knows his size -0r close enough.  He sees them.  He buys them.  He’s out of there.  He doesn’t even have to use the dressing room to “try them on”.  That’s a foreign concept to most guys.  That’s what I call a simple body.

Women on the other hand – come in many sizes and shapes.  Oh I’m not complaining – most Men – Okay all men like women that way.  That’s the way we’re supposed to be.  Curvy.  Not Simple.  Well that creates ALL sorts of major problems when shopping for clothes.  Since no two women are shaped exactly the same – why in the world do they make clothes like we are????  It’s frustrating – infuriating – and I really hate clothes shopping!!!  I used to take my prepubesint daughter shopping – before she had grown into her body – legs were too short for the styles in the junior department – but she was too big for the children’s department.  I’m telling you – the pant length on her from the junior department were a good 6 inches too long!!!  We used to have “high times” in the dressing room – she’d cry and scream and get upset – then I’d cry and get upset – it was really bad for a few years.  Every time we went shopping together I would come home and say “Never Again”  and you can’t make me!!

Today if I want to find something – I have to know my exact size – complete with inseam – because at 5’9″ you would think I have a really long inseam – but actually it’s pretty average – so if I try to buy “tall” pants – they are miles too long – but an average is too short.  It’s horrible.  And I have short arms – thanks to my Mom. 

Now a guy would never worry about inseam.  Oh no.  They make pants for guys with the perfect inseam – you just have to pick it out.  Are you a 36/32 or a 34/34  it’s right there waiting for you on the shelf.  Women don’t have such a thing.  We have “petite”, “average” or “tall”.  Wow.  What if you’re in between?  And a guy would never have to worry about pants not fitting right – when he buys them right off the rack – he has no hips – so they fit like a glove every time.  It’s sickening.  Women have hips.  Again – not complaining, just stating a fact.  But it is really difficult to buy clothes.

Yes – Women are….Complicated.  I’m not just making this stuff up.  I’m married to a guy that tells me this all the time.  Not only does he think I’m complicated – but he can’t understand me most of the time – who could blame him?  I can’t understand myself half the time.  But it’s really true – we expect Men TO understand us.  To get inside our minds and figure us out somehow – and I have known some men that are actually pretty good at it – but I think they are just guessing and really good at it.  The female mind is a scary place to a guy.  And as soon as he thinks he’s figured it out – everything changes anyhow.  You’ve heard of women saying, “Well if you don’t know what’s wrong – I’m NOT going to tell you!”  What is the poor guy to do with that?  It’s just better to pretend, guys.  And leave it at that.  As I’ve told my future son-in-law ,”Repeat after me – you’re right, and I was wrong.  You’re always right, and I’m always wrong.  You’ve NEVER been so right and I’ve NEVER been so wrong”  I’ve told him that his life will be a lot happier if he will say that to Ashlee – like A LOT.  A happy women is what you want.  “If Mama ain’t happy – ain’t NOBODY happy”  is very true.

Women like to be treated special – not like other guys.  They love being feminine – at least most do – and they love it when guys treat them special and are careful with them – and respectful of them.  And to be some one’s “Queen” is very special – because deep down – that’s how all women like to be thought of and treated like.

Complicated?  Yes we are.  Would Men change a thing about us?  No Way!

 

I have never had so many “hits” as from my “Men are Simple” post – well except maybe my post on “Baggage” or “Sin”  What does that say????  Who are all the readers out there – is there something in common with all of you?  Well anyway – I would love to hear your thoughts and comments.  Don’t be shy – I really don’t bite – and I’ve only scared one person off that I know of – so it’s all good!  Drop by and leave me a comment – I promise not to make fun of it – okay I might chuckle a little, like yesterday at one of the comments – but I would never make fun of anyone – honest.

 

Have a super wonderful AWESOME day!

God Bless.

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Comments on: "If Men are Simple – What Are Women???…" (11)

  1. [...] If Men Are Simple…What Are Women??? [...]

  2. Oh Wow – Where did you find this, Ron? Why indeed? You know that you wouldn’t want us to be like you – not for a second! That’s part of our charm and mystery – Can’t live with us and Can’t live without us! Love it! Thanks for posting this, my friend.

  3. Ron Almberg said:

    You know…this is great. But I’m with Henry Higgins when he says to Colonel Hugh Pickering, “Why can’t a woman be more like a man?”

    HIGGINS
    What in all of heaven could’ve promted her to go,
    After such a triumph as the ball?
    What could’ve depressed her;
    What could’ve possessed her?
    I cannot understand the wretch at all.

    Women are irrational, that’s all there is to that!
    There heads are full of cotton, hay, and rags!
    They’re nothing but exasperating, irritating,
    vacillating, calculating, agitating,
    Maddening and infuriating hags!
    [To Pickering]
    Pickering, why can’t a woman be more like a man?
    PICKERING
    Hmm?
    HIGGINS
    Yes…
    Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
    Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
    Eternally noble, historic’ly fair;
    Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
    Well, why can’t a woman be like that?
    Why does ev’ryone do what the others do?
    Can’t a woman learn to use her head?
    Why do they do ev’rything their mothers do?
    Why don’t they grow up- well, like their father instead?
    Why can’t a woman take after a man?
    Men are so pleasant, so easy to please;
    Whenever you are with them, you’re always at ease.
    Would you be slighted if I didn’t speak for hours?
    PICKERING
    Of course not!
    HIGGINS
    Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?
    PICKERING
    Nonsense.
    HIGGINS
    Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?
    PICKERING
    Never.
    HIGGINS
    Well, why can’t a woman be like you?
    One man in a million may shout a bit.
    Now and then there’s one with slight defects;
    One, perhaps, whose truthfulness you doubt a bit.
    But by and large we are a marvelous sex!
    Why can’t a woman take after like a man?
    Cause men are so friendly, good natured and kind.
    A better companion you never will find.
    If I were hours late for dinner, would you bellow?
    PICKERING
    Of course not!
    HIGGINS
    If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?
    PICKERING
    Nonsense.
    HIGGINS
    Would you complain if I took out another fellow?
    PICKERING
    Never.
    HIGGINS
    Well, why can’t a woman be like us?
    [To Mrs. Pearce]
    Mrs. Pearce, you’re a woman…
    Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
    Men are so decent, such regular chaps.
    Ready to help you through any mishaps.
    Ready to buck you up whenever you are glum.
    Why can’t a woman be a chum?
    Why is thinking something women never do?
    Why is logic never even tried?
    Straight’ning up their hair is all they ever do.
    Why don’t they straighten up the mess that’s inside?
    Why can’t a woman behave like a man?
    If I was a woman who’d been to a ball,
    Been hailed as a princess by one and by all;
    Would I start weeping like a bathtub overflowing?
    And carry on as if my home were in a tree?
    Would I run off and never tell me where I’m going?
    Why can’t a woman be like me?

  4. Thanks for you comment, JoJo – I am honored that you stopped by, busy lady that you are! So true about communication – Wow – Men and Women are from two totally different worlds!!

  5. I LOVE Cosby! I have to agree. As a woman who is all of 5′ nothin’ inches tall with a thin short waist, wide hips and “Shapely” legs, I can tell you, I AIN’T easy finding clothes that fit THIS complicated body!

    YOur post reminds me of a seminar I do on the difference in communication between men and women. It’s called “How to talk to your spouse, ‘cuz you must!”

  6. I love it, Cristine!!! That’s a great quote – and I love it that a GUY actually said it!

  7. C. Jennings said:

    You’re so creative! Loved your two blogs about men & women. So fun. I just heard a man talking yesterday with a quote that is similar to those you shared above. He said: “I may not always be right….but I’m NEVER in doubt.”

  8. Well said, Barbara!! And it’s true – Men do have “bellies” I was being very kind to them after all. Women have little “tummies” too – after having babies – but at least WE have an excuse!! I love “bellies” on guys – it’s very cute :) And I crack up at the “one size fits all” too! What a bunch of crock that is!!! Thanks for your hilarious comment!

  9. Barbara said:

    I think the thing most women want to feel is cherished; above all else in our man’s life we are “it”. Men can buy pants like that because they are shapeless, sorry guys! It is true though instead of shapely hips they have bellies and they weren’t meant to fit in their pants, I am trying to be funny:). I feel sorry for my husband, we have 5 daughters, no wonder he is gray and to top it all off he coaches two teenage girl soccer teams. I do not like shopping by any stretch of the imagination. What cracks me up is the stuff they make that says “one size fits all” I am still rolling on the floor laughing in the dressing room, maybe my big toe. Ha! Life would be so boring without women. God made us, to drive our men crazy or make them men of great character. What was that Pastor Troy was teaching on today, about trials, perserverance and us being stronger? hmmm……

  10. Hugs to you, Denise – I’m glad you are indeed “Queen” of your home – so easy when you are surrounded by and adored by the men in your life – Love it!!!

  11. Denise Gormley said:

    Having only had sons all I can say is I’m glad I was the only female in this family. I think my daughter would have hated me and for sure we would have butted heads. But even though I cannot relate to having had a daughter and going shopping with her I do have two sisters. One of whom we are only 19 months apart. MY POOR MOTHER!!! But my mom, being full of grace and compassion for HERSELF, there were many times we walked out with no new clothes and only a sore behind when we got home. Or worse yet the keys to the car were not handed to us the next time we wanted them once we became of driving age. Yes, I can safely say I always wanted to have boys, God gave me only boys, and we can only draw the one conclusion to the fact I had no girls – It was safer for the entire family!! And for me of course my Queen status of the home remained in tact at all times. My guys take good care of me and that is just the way I like it! ☺ By example and through verbal coaching from my husband my sons know how to treat a lady. And you’re right Cindy, its just the way we like it!

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