Guilty

Conviction (film)

Conviction (film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Last night Greg and I watched a movie called “Conviction” – starring Hillary Swank, based on the actual events of a man sent to prison for a murder he did not commit.  He was convicted by a faulty legal system without DNA testing to prove him guilty.  Because of this injustice his sister decided to dedicate her adult life to becoming a lawyer so she could one day represent him, run a formal investigation and then have him released after being proven innocent by testing DNA samples that miraculously were not destroyed after 10 years as was usually the case in the state of Massachusetts.  It took time but she was finally able to get him released 20 years after his original conviction.

This movie moved me so much that I even dreamt about it last night.  In the dream I was friends with the sister and brother and was witnessing first hand the day he was released from prison and sent on his way home.  I was one of the special people allowed in to take pictures of them in a secluded room.  The absolute joy of these siblings was tangible in my dream.  And I was moved beyond words knowing he had missed his daughter growing up and countless other things due to a corrupted legal system that put him away for life in prison without the possibility of parole.

It is impossible to put myself in the place of these siblings whose love for each other is immeasurable.  To simply sacrifice myself for another in that extreme is incomprehensible to me.

The Bible tells us that “while we were yet sinners – Christ died for us” – we were unloving, unwilling and unknown – and yet – Christ still died – sacrificing Himself for us so that we would not have to miss out on anything good in this life and the next.  He gave the best for us even though we were guilty.  Someone might have tried to rescue us, like this sister did her brother because he was innocent – but only God’s great love will do and go beyond the reasonable limits – to find out and seek us out long before we really know and understand.

And I’m grateful.  God loves me that much.  And He loves you that much too.

God Bless

Will You Still Love Me?

English: Picture of Jason Scheff taken at Inte...

English: Picture of Jason Scheff taken at Interlochen Center of the Arts, July 2003 Taken by Jennifer Wicker (KellysMom) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I LOVE 70′s music and bands. Chicago is one of my very favorite bands with their rich vocal and instrumental harmonies. However, this is a band that went well into the 80′s too and after the departure of Peter Cetera they still had many number one hits – like this one featuring new lead vocalist and bass player, Jason Scheff. I heard this on the radio the other morning and had to jot it down. I also love it because it came out in 1987 some 24 years ago – the same year that my daughter was born. I found this music video and wanted to share it with you – great song – great memories.

When was the last time you heard a song on the radio that really took you back?

Enjoy and God Bless

Take me as I am
Put your hand in mine
Now and forever
Darling here I stand
Stand before you now
Deep inside I always knew

It was you
You and me
Two hearts drawn together
Bound by destiny

It was you
And you for me
Every road leads to your door
Every step I take
Forever more

Just say you’ll love me for the rest of your life
I gotta lot of love and I don’t want to let go
Will you still love me for the rest of my life?
’cause I can’t go on
No, I can’t go on
I can’t go on
If I’m on my own

Take me as I am
Put your heart in mine
Stay with me forever
‘Cause I am just a man
Who never understood
I never had a thing to prove

‘Till there was you
You and me
Then it all came clear so suddenly
How close to you that I wanna be

Just say you’ll love me for the rest of your life
I gotta lot of love and I don’t want to let go
Will you still love me for the rest of my life?
‘Cause I can’t go on
No, I can’t go on
I can’t go on
If I’m on my own

Do you believe a love could run so stong?
Do you believe a love could pass you by?
There was no special one for me
I was the lovely one, you see
But then my heart lost all control
Now you’re all that I know

Just say you’ll love me for the rest of your life
I gotta lot of love and I don’t want to let go
Will you still love me for the rest of my life?
‘Cause I can’t go on (I can’t go on)
No, I can’t go on
I can’t go on
If I’m on my own

I can’t go on (I can’t go on)
No, I can’t go on

‘Cause I can’t go on (Will you still love me?)
No, I can’t go on (Just say you love me)
Can’t go on
Without somebody I can call my own

‘Cause I can’t go on (Will you still love me?)
No, I can’t go on (Just say you love me)
(Stay around) Can’t go on

‘Cause I can’t go on (Will you still love me?)
No, I can’t go on (Just say you love me)
Can’t go on
If you could say your love

‘Cause I can’t go on (Will you still love me?)
No, I can’t go on (Just say you love me)
(Stay around) Can’t go on
You’ll never be alone

Home

1992

The other day I got a “blast from the past” as my daughter and son-in-law on a recent road trip to California sent pictures back to me from a life of ours 20 years ago when we lived in Fortuna. Greg was the pastor of a small church for 3 1/2 years, our daughter was 14 months old when we moved there – and our son was born there 3 years later. Consequently, we have many good memories of our time in that place. I think everyone would agree with me – the best times of your life are when your children are small – and it is no different for us, however the humble beginnings and places we’ve lived while raising them.

After visiting that town that Ashlee hardly remembers because she was only 4 years old when we moved away – she called me that night and said, “Mom – how did you live there?  There’s nothing there!”  So true – and yet – we were happy.  We did not have cell phones, computers or any way of social networking.  I went to the park with Ashlee and worked on crafts during the day.  A stress break for me back then was baking.  Life was incredibly simple as we lived in the parsonage right next to the church – so we hardly ever needed the car except to go to the store and on occasion to the mall in a nearby larger town.  Fortuna was small – with one or two grocery stores – but they did have a Papa Murphy’s pizza which was called “Murphy’s” back then.  And you should see the one story hospital where Shawn was born!  The town and circumstances did not dictate to us if we would be content and full of joy in our “job” – we simply were.  Home is and always has been where our heart is.  How fortunate for us in our many moves throughout our ministry life – that we have always rested and relied on that fact.  It doesn’t matter that our children are now grown-up and live away from our home – we established our family home many years ago with them – and they still remember and forever keep it in their hearts.

This song from the recent winner of American Idol, Phillip Phillips – says it all.  I wanted to share it with you today.

Enjoy and God Bless!

Using Laughter

As far back as I can remember – laughter has always been a part of my life. Even today while relaying a very funny story to my husband as we were traveling to an appointment out of town – I was reminded that humor plays such an important role in relationships. Without it, our relationship over the years would have been much too serious, too dry and stale – as humor seems to work like a balm of soothing medicine – breaking down misunderstandings and helping us from becoming too inwardly focused.

I’m sitting in a crowded Starbucks this morning while writing this. I forgot my earphones which turns out to be a rather fatal flaw in my attempts to fully concentrate – as I am sitting rather close to another table where two young men are talking really loudly about scripture, the bible and what they are learning about both. Normally it would be a curious thing for me to observe and silently witness those around me as I am a captive audience in a small room with many people – even humorous if you will – but today as I try to write it does not seem very humorous. In fact – the more intent I am about keeping to myself – the more they seem to talk even louder – as if, somehow – they are trying to witness to me and everyone around us. Funny. I’m afraid to raise my head up from my keyboard – even though it would be amusing to stop, and look right at them and say, “You needn’t try so hard – it’s okay – I’m already in”

Life has so many of the humorous “moments”. Laughter breaks any tension in a room – between people and removes awkwardness in a second. My students are so funny and I have spent much time over the years in my music studio just laughing. Yesterday one of my teenage male students was there with his guitar practicing with me for an upcoming recital in a couple of weeks. He was telling me a funny story about his brother and I’m still giggling about it today!

Another side note – I have a portable case and keyboard for my iPad 2 that I am typing from. It is wireless and for the most part works. However, once in a while I will strike a key and I get it repeatingggggggggggggg like this. So frustrating – not sure what I’m doing wrong for it to have that function and it takes SO MUCH TIME to go back and keep correcting! Once the repeating letter seemed to have a mind of it’s own and went for 6 lines before stopping!! Yikes. Not a good feature. But you’ve got to admit – it’s funny.

Well that is my blog article today. Between the distractions of the two young men trying “get me saved” and my portable wireless keyboard – that’s all I’m good for today. Both these things will make a great story to tell Greg later – can’t wait :)

God Bless

Keep Me In Your Heart

Last night Greg and I watched the goodbye episode of the weekly drama “House“.  We have watched this program from the beginning – all 8 seasons and have loved the acting, story lines, chemistry between the actors and good music choices for the story each week.  If you saw the finale – you no doubt will recall the special song played at the end called “Keep Me In Your Heart” written and sung by the late Warren Zevon when he learned he had terminal cancer.  It brought a very emotional ending to a much beloved character played by Hugh Laurie.  And while the song was playing, different scenes from the many actors were shown – it was really beautiful.  Here is the song – hope you enjoy it.

 

God Bless

The Wind (album)

The Wind (album) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Shadows are falling and I’m running out of breath
Keep me in your heart for awhile

If I leave you it doesn’t mean I love you any less
Keep me in your heart for awhile

When you get up in the morning and you see that crazy sun
Keep me in your heart for awhile

There’s a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Sometimes when you’re doing simple things
around the house
Maybe you’ll think of me and smile

You know I’m tied to you like the buttons on
your blouse
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Hold me in your thoughts, take me to your dreams
Touch me as I fall into view
When the winter comes keep the fires lit
And I will be right next to you

Engine driver’s headed north to Pleasant Stream
Keep me in your heart for awhile

These wheels keep turning but they’re running out
of steam
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile

Keep me in your heart for awhile

Wherever You Are – Be There

Dear Lord – help me to be present today  with friends, family and students.  I can be so distracted with things that creep into my world and ‘shake it up’ a bit.  Help me to put all other “things” on hold – take a deep breath and relax for the moment, fully concentrating all my thoughts and focus on the here and now.  Everything else can wait.  Amen.

Flower

Flower (Photo credit: RedTail_Panther)

 

I believe that it is a choice to focus on living in the present – wherever I am – I want to be fully there.

When was the last time you had to get a hold of your thoughts and tell yourself to relax, focus and just be there?

 

God Bless

 

We Are More Alike Than We Think

United Methodist Church, in

United Methodist Church, in (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Greg and I have had the privilege lately of visiting churches on Sunday mornings here in the Pacific Northwest.  We have been open to trying other denominations and have listened and taken everything in with no judgement or bias (well…maybe a little bias) and have appreciated things new and unfamiliar to us.

In our search we have met some really wonderful people, seen and heard some great music and teaching ministries. The most impressive have been the people in these different denominations.  Deep down inside I’m forced to admit, that I expected people who didn’t think and believe exactly like me to be unfriendly, hostile, pushy and illiterate, lacking depth and reasoning skills.  Pretty dumb.  But the teachings of childhood are hard to shake and once we get a preconceived idea in our head – it is very hard to change it.

As Greg and I have journeyed through our denomination and seen many changes happening in the music, it has been both good and bad for us.  Good in that our kids really enjoyed the progressive trend toward all things modern and new and bad for us in that some of it is just too much the same, some too hard to follow, some too loud etc.  We are somewhere between modern and 20 years ago – and to be honest the music of 15 years ago still suits us best.  Take away choir and orchestra music of our denomination and you’re left with just a worship band with not much variety.

So we have explored music of the more traditional denominations that we thought we would NEVER be interested in.  The Presbyterian and Methodist being among our favorite choices so far – for their depth of teaching, variety of music and beauty of the service.  I was never familiar with a more liturgical service (thought it was only in the Catholic church) had been to a Lutheran service once or twice where my Dad is the organist and was convinced that it was not for me.  But there is a beauty to the order and planning of every scripture reading - hymn chosen and scripture song sung for the message.

Nothing can compare to the pipe organ and huge choir at 1st Presbyterian Church in Bellevue.  The pastor is very interesting, uses humor and deep teaching to make his points clear – and honestly, it’s the best music in “church” I’ve ever heard.

But proximity is very important if hoping to become involved – and we are a couple of miles from Fairwood Community United Methodist Church where I visited yesterday.  I’ve always been curious because this is the lovely little church that I rent twice a year to have my recitals with my students.  I’m not sure what I expected – but it was certainly different (in a good way) than what I thought it would be.  The people were so friendly - had two people engage with me (I was late) before I even got into the sanctuary while standing in the foyer while the choir and teenagers being confirmed were on the platform singing an opening number.  They treated me like I was already one of them.  Then I found my seat toward the back and a nice older man behind me helped me as I stumbled a few times, wondering what book they were singing from.  There were 6 eighth graders that had been confirmed in the earlier service and were a part of the beginning part of the service that I was in – with introductions and explanation to the younger children and adults (like me unfamiliar with confirmation) of what was being done.

The pastor of this church is a woman.  I did not know how I would feel about this.  But my concerns were quickly diminished when I heard her speak and saw her with the children.  She uses humor and relevant topics to convey her point – yesterday she spoke on “Heroes” and used “The Hunger Games” as her premise.  It was relevant and interesting.  I looked around and saw many people just like me.  The same needs, concerns and place in life.  Many have never walked the road in ministry that we have – or ever will – they will never know what we have experienced in another denomination – never see things around the country and here in our own city inside a different type of church – and yet – I realized this:  we are more alike than we think.

I’m not sure where our journey will ultimately end – but in the meantime, I am reassured that God is not just restricted to one denomination.  He is everywhere - relevant to those who seek Him.  Ever present in our songs of worship, our traditional choir anthems and in our prayers offered up in reverence.  We have good friends from the Tri-Cities area who have been pastors like us in our denomination and have found themselves feeling quite at home in the Methodist Church.

When was the last time you visited something different from what you’re used to and were forced to removed the box where your God exists for you?  When was the last time you were really open?  Will it surprise you to see some people from other denominations in heaven with you?  We are the ones who put people in denominations and categories of “spiritual” and “non-spiritual” – God does not.  He just sees the heart.

Lord help me to be open to things that are different.  Help me to see people the way you see them.  Help me to engage in a way that I am always open to your leading.  Amen.

God Bless

Lost

I have been lost many times. Not because it is fun but because I have no sense of direction. At all.

Usually this happens in the car while driving somewhere. Sometimes I don’t even have to be in the car – but just looking for it.

When my children were small I got lost driving places all the time. Before cell phones I would get exasperated and finally pull to the side of the road and feel like having a good cry, but usually I stopped myself because the kids were in the car and I wanted them to believe that I could do anything even be strong and get them anywhere we needed to go. But they knew the truth. I was simply and hopelessly lost.

In one such comical moment when living in Fort Worth, Texas – I was driving with 5-year-old Ashlee in the pouring rain. We were on the freeway, I missed my exit and was really lost. I remember feeling so annoyed and a little scared too – I mean where in the world was I anyway? I even enlisted the help of my 5-year-old and said, “Ashlee please help me read those blasted signs!” To which she replied, “Mom – I can’t read” Oh yeah – details.

Fast forward to the mid-nineties when we had our first cell phones. I was a sales director in training in those days and did much of my business on the phone while commuting between Kirkland where we lived – and Renton where we went to church. In those days it was not against the law to talk on a cell phone while you drove so I got much done that way with my sales calls. One time because I hate to drive on the freeway in the rain – I chose to take a “back way” home. I got lost. Again. I called Greg from where I was and couldn’t even tell him where I was so the cell phone couldn’t help me!

Fast forward again to the present – where I now own an iPhone with navigational ability. Yeah for me! Yeah for progress! Except….when the maps on the iPhone takes me a “back way” just because – and l end up in a neighborhood that looks nothing like the neighborhood I’m supposed to be in! It was someplace I had been before, but not for 2 years. I thought the map would direct me so I didn’t take along the directions. I was hot, tired and in a bad mood after trying to follow to the letter – the step by step instructions on the map app. Daisy my 8 month old puppy was along for the “easy” drive and gave up on being patient 30 minutes previous to me finally pulling along the side of the road. I thought to myself, “this can’t be happening to me again” and was not a bit funny as I found myself wanting to cry. How silly, I thought. Who cries over being lost? I guess I do.

I called Greg and he suggested that I try mapquest or another map app – and if that didn’t work – I should just go back to the place I remember and the map app would redirect me. If he heard me whining and whimpering (just a little) he never let on. I mean – how bad could it be, right? Except for being hot and cranky and Daisy too – we were still in one piece, had less than a quarter tank of gas and no one needed to go to the bathroom. Yet. I tried the address in mapquest and a funny thing happened. It did not even recognize the address and tried to give me an alternate one. After circling around in that neighborhood a few times I finally found my way out and to the main road. I had to rely on my very bad memory and NO sense of direction to get me to the right street – but I eventually found it.

But a strange thing happened as I perused the house numbers. The house that I knew had to be the house was one number off from the address I had typed into the map app.

Oh brother.

Have you ever been really lost? What’s your story?

God Bless

When Things Work

Most things in our lives work.  It is when they don’t, that we notice.

Image representing Apple as depicted in CrunchBase

Image via CrunchBase

I now am the proud owner of three devices – an iMac, iPhone and now an iPad 2 (thanks to a very generous gift from my son for Mother’s Day).  It can be triple trouble when things go wrong – not to mention having triple the junk mail to delete every day :)

Because I also run a business and manage personal appointments, my calendar is very important to me.  The nice man at the Apple store told me I needed iCloud to sync my devices together wirelessly – and he turned the feature on – on both my iPhone and iPad.  Unfortunately, he did not realize that at home I have an older Mac, which does not support iCloud – and by turning on this feature, I received duplicates on everything on my calendars.  So while coming home, I deleted all the duplicate entries on my iPhone.  But when I arrived home to check this with iCal on my iMac I found to my despair – EVERYTHING had been erased!  Just vanished into thin air!  I remember having this problem when I first got my iPhone and the only fix was to turn off iCloud – I just couldn’t remember why!  Now I know.

ICloud

ICloud (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

While trying to rebuild the information from both my iPhone and iPad 2 – I found that many things were gone and there were significant holes in my schedule.  This was a disaster because I have 25 music lessons every week and some of those appointments had to reschedule or change and I now had to rely on my faulty memory – not good.  It was a panicky situation for me.

I read every forum I could get my hands on talking about syncing my calendars so I would never have this problem again – but came up empty every time.  There was a way around iCloud on iCal – but I could not understand it – even though it was supposed to be easy.  I called my techie son who works for Apple and it was discovered that I don’t have enough memory and would need to buy more memory and then do an upgrade to Lion before I could get iCloud on my Mac.  It was discouraging and expensive.  All I wanted was to sync my calendars and for it to work.

So I slept on it – and the next morning I tried again.  I came across another forum talking about the same problem as mine.  This time the “fix” was so easy I felt almost ridiculous trying it.  In the process I was on hold for an Apple techie to see if I had done everything I could.  By the time a young man came on the line I was well into solving the problem by syncing the three calendars on iTunes with a special iCloud code that was given in the forum I was reading.  The Apple tech – (bless his heart) said that it basically couldn’t be done and that I needed the upgrade.  Period.

So when this simple “fix” WORKED – I was AMAZED and ELATED!!

We often take things for granted when they work.

Do you have a problem you’re trying to solve?  Don’t give up.  There is always an answer.  It may not be the answer you’re wanting or thinking needs to happen – but there is always an answer. 

Look for another way – think outside the box and find out what works.

God Bless